Six Emotions
by Confusion No Hime
Summary: Lambo and Reborn feels six emotions as they deal with a secret that slowly destroys them.
1. Chapter 1

**Author Notes:** Okay, I was feeling emo and I needed to get my depression out of my system so I wrote this fic. This is my first KHR fanfiction and frankly speaking, I didn't expect that it'll be about RebornxLambo. So yes, that means they might be OOC or I probably did a poor job at portraying them. Anyhow, I hope you will still read this and please tell me what you think.:D

**Warnings:** This fic contains yaoi/malexmale and sexual graphical scenes.

**Disclaimer: **Amane-sensei owns them. I'm just borrowing them for pleasure's sake.

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**Six Emotions**

by Confusion No Hime

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**LAMBO**

**1. Horror.**

Green eyes stared at the lifeless piece of paper in front of him. He looked at it as if it was a monster threatening to destroy him. That could pass up as a stupid joke but the revolting reality still remained that the short letter had indeed came to bring the death of him.

Out of all the one hundred words written on that paper in his trembling hands, only two words were visible to him.

Diagnosis: LEUKEMIA

**2. Love.**

His kisses seemed to scorch his sensitive skin; his large and rough hands were gentle as they passed through every curve and plane of his lithe body. Being held by Reborn was heaven for him. Being loved by him makes him want to live his sinful life longer.

The rhythm of their erotic dance increased as pleasure continued to assault every fiber of his nerves and every cell in his body, making him gasp for air and his heart beat erratically. His eyes rolled at the back of his head as he reached nirvana, four words spilling like wine from his parted lips.

"I love you, Reborn."

**3. Lies.**

Tsuna gazed intently at him as if he had dirt on his face. The young boss' caramel eyes glazed with wonder and concern. He looked back, focused on keeping his attention towards the young Vongola, determined in hiding his dark secret though his head hurts like hell and his vision were quickly blurring.

"Are you okay, Lambo?" The young boss asked with genuine concern that secretly warmed his heart and bothered him at the same time. He couldn't let anyone in his family know his secret. "You're looking a little pale and thin these days."

He forced a smile on his lips. "Yes, I'm okay. Don't worry. I'm not getting much sleep these days. I promise to catch up on it once I finish my mission." He lied.

**4. Hate.**

He hates Reborn. Up until now, he still couldn't grasp the reason as to how he had fallen in-love with him. The man was arrogant, cold and sadistic. He didn't care about anything or anyone else. He didn't even care for him and treated him like shit. But despite his immense hatred for the Arcobaleno, he loved him... he loved him like his entire life depended on him.

Tears fell down his cheeks as he looked at the sight of the man he love, handsome, naked, with a smirk on his proud face and an equally naked woman beside him. He searched the Arcobaleno's dark eyes, hoping for any sign of sorry or remorse but there was none... only arrogance and cruelty.

It wasn't the first time that he caught Reborn sleeping with another woman in his lover's apartment and it wasn't the first time that he hated himself for loving him more than his life.

**5. Misery.**

He was slowly dying every single day, every piece of him was being broken by the disease that has already taken a thousand lives before his. It has been five months since he was diagnosed. His doctor convinced him to stay in the hospital to lengthen his withering life but he refused. If he would die, he didn't want it to be in the hospital. And he didn't want the people he love to know that he died from a horrible sickness. He didn't want to be pitied... especially by Reborn.

He wanted to live longer, really, he did. He still wanted to be with the loving yet crazy people that he called his family. And although he hated himself for thinking it, he still wanted to be with Reborn. But he knew that there was no hope for him... he was destined to die and disappear in this world like an old memory that would soon be forgotten.

He wrapped his arms around himself and buried his face between his knees, endless tears streaming down his white face as he cried his heart out in sorrow and agony, wishing that his heart would just stop to end his misery.

**6. Agony.**

His bedroom door flew open with a force that shook the entire house. He quickly looked up, fear and pain suddenly torturing his insides as Reborn went inside with a smirk, walking proudly towards him.

He tried to glare, hoping that his droopy eyes were sending the right message he wanted to convey.

"Still crying? You're really pathetic." The other man teased; his voice deep yet as cold as ice.

He wanted to say something but no words came out of his mouth. His lips stayed parted in a silent scream that he wished Reborn could hear. He tore his gaze away from him and looked to the floor, trying his best to stop the tears from falling.

"W-why are you here?" He demanded, hoping that his voice was loud enough to show that he was angry.

The Arcobaleno just smirked then approached him. He felt a strong hand grab his arm, yank him up and push him on the bed. He knew what was gonna happen. Reborn would forcefully take him and show how miserable and pathetic he was for feeling pleasure while he was dryly fucked and abused. He usually struggled but his body was already too weak to protest.

Reborn smirked at him. "What? You're gonna be good today? How surprising." He commented with twisted amusement as he zipped his fly down and pulled his erection out.

Tears started falling from his eyes as he averted his gaze to hide his pain, biting his lip in an attempt to stop himself from screaming as his lover violently ripped his pants off of him and shoved his cock inside his unprepared entrance.

The Arcobaleno thrust into him, hard, fast and unrelenting. He didn't stop until even when blood poured out of his anus. He wasn't horrified to discover that anymore, sex with Reborn has always involved blood and pain. He was used to it but then, why was it that his heart was still breaking, voicelessly screaming in agony? Did it mean he was also already used to the emotional pain his lover always inflicted on him?

Reborn pulled out of him for a second and rolled him on his stomach, only to drive back in and put more strength into his thrusts. He buried his face on the crumpled sheets, muffling his cries and screams, wondering when will the painful torture end. He lifted his head up when the need for oxygen taunted his muddled brain. He took a deep breath but no air came inside his already burning chest. He gasped, clawing on the sheets as the erratic movement of his body made breathing seemed harder.

"S-stop..." He uttered in a raspy voice. "S-top... Rebo... Reborn..."

Reborn ignored him. As usual, he ignored his cries of pain and agony, intent on only achieving his own pleasure. So, he stopped and let his head fall back on the mattress. All of a sudden, he felt a hard lump form inside his chest. He coughed hard, feeling the lump drive up his throat and out of his mouth in the form of blood and tasted the metallic taste of that crimson liquid on his tongue. Blood stained the pristine white sheets as his body slowly lost all of its strength and energy, as darkness languidly engulfed his vision.

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**Author Notes:** Okay, it's not finished yet. There's going to be a next chapter that tells about Reborn's side of the story. Please tell me what you think and don't flame me. Concrits are welcome of course, only if you will deliver them in a very nice manner.:D Thanks for reading!


	2. Chapter 2

**Author notes:** Thanks to those who read and reviewed the first chapter. I'm glad my stupid fic had somehow affected you, LOL! Well, here's the second and last chapter that tells about Reborn's side of the story. Hope you enjoy.

**Warnings:** This fic contains yaoi (malexmale), angst and character death.

**Disclaimer:** Amane-sensei owns it.

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**REBORN**

**1. Horror.**

A groan rumbled inside his chest as he came, closing his eyes shut as he reveled on the opposite emotions that fought wildly inside his chest. He was happy to know that the dumb cow was still his but he couldn't help but feel sad as well when he knew that he was also hurting his lover in the process.

He exhaled and pulled his spent cock from his lover's bleeding orifice. He felt sorry for the physical pain but it was the only way to show Lambo that he owned him. His sad eyes traveled upwards and gazed wonderingly again at the purplish bruises that seemed to cover the dumb cow's waist, asking himself if he had also inflicted those ugly marks on him. He slowly released his lover's hips and as expected, the body completely fell down on the bed with a soft thud.

He took a deep breath and spoke. "Hey, stupid cow. Are you awake?" he asked in a cold voice.

No response was heard.

He nudged his lover's thigh with his knee, waiting for a reaction but there was none. He looked at the man's back and was somehow relieved to see it moving but in a very slow manner. Knotting his brows together, he violently tapped Lambo on the shoulder, everything around him seemed to stop in an instant as he saw the blood that stained the young Bovino's cheek. Silently panicking, he rolled his lover on his back and confirmed his fear, his eyes widening in horror.

**2. Love.**

He had never realized how he loved Lambo until now. He tried his best to keep his jaw from slacking as the doctor announced what was wrong with his lover but his efforts were useless. He still gawked and gaped as the doctor's words tattooed themselves in his head.

"He has Leukemia, Reborn-san. He's dying."

His heart thumped painfully in his chest, indescribable fear gripped him.

**3. Lies**

He was there, standing solemnly in a corner when the Bovino woke up. He fought the urge to run to him, ask him if he was okay, demand why he had kept his disease from him and the painful truth that he was dying. The Lightning Guardian looked around, his green eyes widening in shock as he saw him. He pushed himself off the wall and coolly approached him, his knuckles pale white inside his pockets.

Lambo looked down, avoiding his piercing gaze. He stopped beside his lover and just watched him, waiting if the other man would tell him the truth. Confusion and nervousness was anxious in the cow's features, probably wondering if he already knew his secret. He silently took a deep breath. "You're dying."

He felt his lover's body tensed. The other man slowly gazed at him and forced a smile on his face. "T-that's some funny joke."

In an instant, he felt anger wash over him like a tidal wave. "Stop fucking lying! I already know the truth! You're dying and you didn't tell me! Why the hell did you keep it from me?"

The guardian looked fearfully at him, then, he looked at his shaking hands, an expression of sadness gracing his face. "Why? You don't care about me anyway." He mumbled.

A stab. If the words he said were real weapons, he would've probably bled to death right then and there. He slapped his forehead and rubbed his temples, feeling like shit. "I was lying… dammit. I really do care about you, stupid cow."

**4. Hate.**

He hate himself. He knew it was too late to do that and regret everything he did to Lambo but he still felt it anyway. He knew he was at fault when he tried to cover his real emotions with coldness and sadism. It was wrong to treat the man he loved like he was some piece of shit but he couldn't help it. He thought showing affection was an act of showing weakness. He was Reborn, the Sun Arcobaleno. He was known for being strong and brave; there was no place for him to show weakness.

But now that he was about to lose the man he loved, he realized how stupid he was for thinking that way. Lambo was dying and all he did to his lover was bring him pain. It was too late now to make up to him. It was too late for him to show how he love and treasure the Lightning Guardian and it was all because of his stupid pride and senseless resolve.

He really, really hate himself.

**5. Misery**

Despite the pain he caused Lambo, the other man had still forgiven him. And through the forgiveness his lover had demonstrated, he only felt miserable. He definitely did not deserve to have Lambo.

It didn't take long for the entire Vongola to know about their Lightning Guardian's condition. Tsuna, Kyoko, Haru and Ipin cried when they found out. Yamamoto and Gokudera was on the verge of tears. Chrome also looked sad while Hibari had this sympathetic expression on his face. Everyone was traumatized with sadness and pain. Losing a friend was never easy after all.

After three weeks of staying in the hospital, Lambo decided to go home to the headquarters where he could be with his family. Kyoko and the girls would go to his room and feed him his favorite food while Tsuna and the other guardians would drop by sometimes to see how he was doing. As for Reborn, he would always visit his lover every morning and evening.

"You've changed." Lambo casually cited one evening as he lie down on his bed, his face pale and weak.

"I know." He replied as he held his lover's cold hand, playing with his fingers. He felt happy to be able to show his feelings even through small acts like this, but misery was still haunting him. He couldn't picture himself being alone once Lambo was gone. He wanted to prepare himself for what was coming but he knew no preparation could help him fight against the impending misery he was about to suffer after his lover's death.

**6. Agony.**

Two months. Lambo's life only took two months before the disease that slowly infected him took his life. His heart twisted and turned in pain, his entire being screaming in agony. He already expected the pain that would attack him, but he didn't expect that it was going to be this painful. Tears streamed silently down his face as he looked at the young Bovino's grave, gazing longingly and miserably at it with his raven eyes. He just couldn't imagine himself living without Lambo and now that he was gone, what would happen to him?

Was he going to die too? Continue living? Or forever wallow in this inescapable misery and intoxicating agony? God knew how he wanted to consider the first and last option but the Lightning Guardian's words before he died burned through his soul.

_I know you're not dumb enough to kill yourself after my death. I'm going to be sad if I saw you in heaven or hell soon after I die._

Those were just words spoken probably in jest, but still it blew him strong enough to realize that his lover wanted him to live longer. He thought it was unfair, to continue bearing this horrifying agony alone while his lover look down at him in heaven or up at him in hell. But then, he deserved to carry that agony till the end for the countless sins and mistakes he did to the man he loved.

Carrying this heavy agony on his shoulder was his only way of making up for his sins and to remember his dumb cow.

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**Author Notes:** I know sucky ending and maybe sucky chapter as well. Reviews are welcome and will be considered as love. Thanks for reading!


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